That's life in the city

My grandpa has a favorite saying, one that I'm not even actually sure he realizes he says a lot.

When I am exasperated over traffic, or people or frustrated with life, grandpa often says, "That's life in the city."

He's been saying it most of my life, and I assume it's his way of saying, life happens and the world moves on.

This week has been a drastic turn around from my last post. Much like Ohio weather, many mornings I tell myself, give it ten minutes and it could change.

After horseback riding Saturday, I woke up Sunday determined to have an adventure even if it meant going by myself. That led me to look up abandoned Ohio, and finding Squire Castle.

Squire Castle is in Willoughby Hills, Ohio, and it sits on more than 500 acres of wooded area, and walking, biking and riding trails.

The castle isn't actually a castle. It's the remains of a gatehouse to what would have been a castle, but the property owner died and his wife abandoned the project and sold the land to the Cleveland Metropolitan Parks.

I called my niece and kept my fingers crossed that she would go with me.

Though we got a late start, the adventure turned into a family event. Two car loads of people who I love raced to see the castle.

We got a little lost, but like I told Danny, getting lost is half the adventure sometimes. We also left the walking trail and climbed up a hill (me in flip flops of course).

It was the drive that started to heal me, more than the adventure. Drives with Danny are always filled with laughter, singing and silly skits that we do. That girl is part of my strength sometimes and a great reminder that I have people to be a role model for.

Monday was a rough start, I will admit. I was exhausted and tired, but had a Memorial Day service to cover.

That has a way of putting your life into perspective.  Things can get bad, but there are still people who gave their lives for us to be able to have free speech. I still have two good legs, I still have two good arms, I still am above the ground.

We owe those who have fallen, a great debt of gratitude.

Remember the person I love who stopped breathing? By Monday he was off the vent and breathing on his own and even able to say a few words to me.

The nurse said it was a complete turn around.

Thursday, I had the chance to go to Columbus and see a woman inducted into the Senior Citizens Hall of Fame. Okay, I didn't see her really. She was off to Ukraine on a mission trip to teach English for three weeks.

The woman was one of nine inductees each year, as each person's accomplishments was read I was exhausted by them.

These people were in their 80's, still in good health, still crazy active, still a huge part of their communities, still thriving and learning and teaching!

I hope I'm like that when I'm 86. \

Speaking of people in their 80's...it wouldn't be a trip to Columbus unless I had dinner with Grandpa.

Of course, he's still the master of directions. He gave me quick directions to the restaurant we normally meet at. It was a good dinner. Grandpa always makes me laugh, maybe it's because he's such a pull no punches type person.

Maybe it's cause he's actually wise and because nothing I do really seems to surprise him. Grandpa is one of those people that I'm honest with about things, because I know you can't bullshit him.

As we talked about the boys, I asked, "What am I going to do after they're gone, for real?"

Grandpa said, "Move to a bigger city." He also said that he knows that I will struggle with the decision because I have friends and family where I'm at and I love them.

"You'll have to weigh the decision of whether you want to leave them to grow your own way."

I'm still weighing that, Grandpa.
Three cities in one week, sometimes I do miss the sky scrapers and the 24 hour delivery service of any type of food imaginable. Once in awhile, I miss the lights. Time will tell.

He also joked with me (only half joking) that my FB looks like I drink a lot. I promise that at many of the events I'm at, I'm dead sober. I'm just a wild child sober.

"Grandpa, it's a good thing your generation didn't have social media. I have a feeling yours would have looked a lot like mine."

He actually said, probably.

Last night, I went with one of my best friends to fulfill an adolescent dream. I went to see Nelly, TLC and NKOTB.

We had nosebleed seats, I wanted to smack a couple of people with a cane and remind them their daddies weren't glassmakers, I got to see 30 some year old white woman take selfies through the entire concert....but the show itself was GREAT.

I cried when "T-Boz" and "Chili" said no one will ever take the place of left eye. I sang along to "Creep", "Redlight Special" and "Waterfalls."

When NKOTB came out, I screamed and cheered. When they pulled up a song from 1992, I wanted to go apologize to my adolescent self.

I wanted to go back and tell 13-year old Jennifer, this isn't the end of the world. No matter how dark it seems today, I promise someday you'll be a really cool adult.

I wanted to tell her, you're strong enough to get through life. You're going to have some challenges, you're going to have some struggles, you're going to have days everything goes wrong and days you feel like no one understands why you're angry, why you're hurting and what you're going through.

Maybe part of me went to the concert as I way of telling the little girl I was, hey...you'll find a way.

I wanted to tell her most of all, she's forgiven. 

Cari and I talked about a lot of things. I think one of the things she worries about with me is that I will get so lonely I will settle for the first jerk that comes along and pays me some attention.

No worries. Remember, I'm pretty sure that I've put up with so much crap in life that I'm unwilling to put up with more.

Remember, "I'm funny, smart and cute! Dangit!" I won't forget that.

I guess, I want to give advice to my future self.

I want to remind my future self, there are gonna be some bad days, but you have been through hell and back and still manage to smile.

I want to remind my future self, keep your sense of humor in every situation. Don't react for 24 hours, and if you get to a point in your life, where you find that guy, Don't take him for granted, don't be jealous, and don't get so involved in his life that you forget your girlfriends.

I want to tell my future self, yes things are sagging, you're going gray and sometimes things hurt. Dammit, get outta bed so you can have an adventure and don't forget to get lost once in awhile.

If you get into a situation where you're not sure what to do, ask yourself, "What would Uncle Ken do? What would Uncle Joe do? What would Grandpa do?"

Pick one of their reactions. It's either gonna lead to greatness, or one hell of a story.

Don't ever lose your ability to smile, don't ever lose your ability to laugh, don't ever lose your ability to get over the next hump and don't ever stop learning.

That ladies and gentlemen, is life in the city.