Do you believe in Magic?

Do you ever just wake up with a smile on your face, and think that maybe someone finally sprinkled a little magic in your life?

This writing isn’t about some big adventure. This writing is an evaluation of my last 12 months, with some goal setting thrown in. It’s my typical December post.

Walking into 2018, I knew I would be making a few life changes. I knew there was a possibility I would change careers, I knew that wonderful little convertible I had would eventually die. I knew I would have grand adventures.

At midnight, I ran around in my fabulous self-made ballgown, giving hugs to friends, and strangers alike. I felt like there was magic in those moments, and I wasn’t wrong.

Within the month, I changed careers, and got a new car. The two biggest goals of 2018 were almost accomplished.

My adventures this year have been plenty, from a weekend trip to Chicago – with a side trip and tears cried as I walked into Hemingway’s birth home, a day spent in D.C. with men and women that know what “sacrifice” really means, and finally finishing off my Ohio castles list.

I’ve had mini-adventures too. I’ve watched a best friend get married, gone to concerts, and taken road trips to new restaurants. I’ve danced in new places, and made friends.

This year has been good to me.

The lessons I have learned this year have been plenty. One of those lessons being, that yes, I am all too often my own harshest critic, and sometimes that carries over to people I love. I have learned, and am learning, that their decisions and reactions are their own. We cannot live each other’s lives, but at the end of the day, I couldn’t make it through without them to fall back on, to love and to give and take advice from. They’re my biggest cheerleaders and supporters. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful to them for loving and believing in me.

This year, my novel was finally finished, editing and all. It will be published in early spring. As a writer, I thought I knew that my next novel would be about PTSD. That’s what I want to write about, the subject of my life keeps popping up though; and as it was said last night, maybe my story should be told if it would help one person fight to the next day.

The truth is, sometimes I’m astounded by the things I’ve been through, and how far I’ve come. I came back fighting from the depths of hell. I want other people to know the fight is worth it.

As everyone knows, because they’ve seen a billion and half pictures, I’ve lost 32 pounds this year. I finally have a healthy way of eating, working out every day, and feel (and look)  a lot like I used to in my 20s.

I’ve added some volunteer responsibilities to my already busy schedule, and now in addition to being a literacy tutor, I sit on the board of Project H.O.P.E., expect to hear more about that in 2019.

I have had moments of sadness this year, but I didn’t let them break me. I let myself cry real tears, instead of trying to hold in emotions.

Mostly, I’ve learned this year that it is ok to take some solitary “me” time. It’s ok to take time to refresh myself. I’m an empath, so that has been something I never did before this year, just take time to myself to not absorb other people’s emotions, and just sit in mine. That self-time- allows me to be better when I am around people, because it helps me to center and figure out what I’m feeling.

The question as I write this, is what are my goals for 2019?

As always, my number one goal is to have adventures and see something new, that I haven’t seen before.

In 2018, I started taking a few free online classes, and listening to podcasts about everything from mythology to psychology. The need to continue learning still burns, and I may at some point decide to further my education, and get my Masters. I just don’t know if 2019 is that year.

There will be book signings in 2019, and I hope my audience takes the right message from “Spoons and Needles- the story of how addiction impacts a family.”

I will have a new niece born in 2019, and I hope to be a good role model to all my nieces.

I will let myself be creative in 2019, and revisit my love for crafts, sewing and all things glitter.

One of the things I’m still working on learning, is that when things are going well in your life, you can’t always be looking for the other shoe to drop. That may be a lesson I’m always learning and re-learning.

This year, the smiles have finally been real again, and not coerced and forced for pictures. I think one of the biggest things I am trying to learn in 2019, is to let myself believe in magic again.

The road less taken sometimes has the best scenery.

Sometimes it’s strange to look back on your past year, and see how much things have grown and you have changed during that year.  These days I feel a lot more like my normal self.

For those wondering how my 2017 is going, I will tell you, I have started to have adventures, and follow my goals again, just like I promised I would. This year is indeed becoming a year of possibilities, and the year I won’t say no to any opportunity, no matter how slim the chance.

The biggest goal that I had this year, was to edit my novel and start sending it to agents. It has been a scary ride. Not many people can understand what it takes to not only complete a novel, to tear into it with a critical eye, and then send something you’ve poured your heart and soul into, to be ripped apart and criticized.

I’ve gotten my second rejection letter, I expect more, but what I tell myself, is that I am indeed in the company of greats that received multiple rejections before they ever got a yet. I think what some people don’t realize, is that if you never fail, it means you’ve never actually tried at anything.

Someone recently told me, “Some of the greatest achievements in life are built by disappointments.” That will stick with me forever.

In an effort to push myself a little out of my comfort zone, I’ve started dance classes. The classes are once a week, on Thursdays at the Findlay Art League.

For the first one, I was so nervous that I would be the only single person there, that it would be only couples. That’s not how it is at all, and I’ve met a few people that I enjoy hanging out with and enjoy dancing with, even if sometimes I completely look like I don’t have a clue what I’m doing.  I still enjoy learning.

Those adventures are both ongoing. As is the continuation of the tutoring I do, continuing work on “This Is Findlay” Magazine, and actually, starting to broaden my horizons and look at other opportunities and volunteer work.

This weekend, I had a much needed escape and adventure, thanks very much to a friend of mine, who also has an adventurous spirit. We took a few detours through and around Cleveland.

When she messaged me a month or so ago to tell me about the concert in Cleveland, filled with R&B musicians from my youth, I was excited and of course,  began my  usual planning. It was also nice to be able to spend a weekend with a friend I haven't seen for several months. 

We stopped to eat lunch at Melt Bar &Grilled in Independence. It wasn’t bad. The service was good, the sangria was strong, the way I like it, but some people don’t. So that’s definitely a preference. The sandwiches were huge, so, my recommendation, is always go with the half. I could barely finish a half sandwich, I have no clue how anyone could finish a whole one! (Of course, someone will take that as a challenge. More power to you, and if you finish it, I want pictures of you trying to leave the restaurant.)

Luckily, we got there before lunch hour, because it quickly got busy while we were there. My suggestion, don’t try to have a private conversation during any busy time. The table next to you is less than three feet away from you, and every intimate detail can be heard.

With time to kill before we could check into the hotel, Brittany and I were racking our brains for something to do that didn’t involve early day drinking. Luckily, I remembered something I had been wanting to try.

Every time I have made it anywhere near Cleveland, B. A. Sweetie Candy Company has been closed. So I was excited to finally be able to visit and all I can say is…holy Jelly Belly! I’m sure that no one would be surprised to know that I wanted to stay in that particular aisle, well that and the Pez aisle, forever.

Any type of candy your childhood self could want, can be found in those aisles, and in the words of Brittany “I’m living the dream of my 10 year old self!”

Alas, it was time to check into our hotel. The location of our hotel was mostly luck, because when I originally booked, I booked by the airport, but after some thought, I decided downtown would be better. That’s how we ended up in the Raddison, directly across from Quicken Arena, and about 12 blocks away from the concert venue.

Because of our location, we were provided with plenty of entertainment from the people entering the arena, while we proceeded to get ready for our own evening entertainment. A couple of suggestions for first timers, 1. Pay the $26 for valet parking. It’s worth it, especially on a game night. Otherwise, there is no telling where we would have ended up parking. We weren’t planning to use the car really at all over the next day, but it was still better to have an idea that it was in a secure lot.

Now, this may come as no shock to most of you, but because it was game night, it was a little hard to find a restaurant nearby for a pre-show appetizer. Luckily for me, my partner in crime also has an adventurous spirit, and was willing to walk the extra blocks through Playhouse Square, where we discovered a new treasure.

First, let me start by saying I am in love with the chandelier hanging in the square, which according to playhousesquare.org, is the largest permanent chandelier in the world.

That wasn’t the treasure that we found though. We found a restaurant, with no wait time, that had actually only been opened for two days upon the time of our visit. Puente Viejo is  the new taco and tequila bar, located at 1220 Huron Road.

While we debated on whether or not to share an appetizer, I was glad we went with yes. The chicken quesadilla appetizer, for $9.50 was enough to fill both of us up, along with our frozen strawberry margaritas of course.

The owner, Marc Price, made it a point to stop, visit our table and chat for a bit. So here’s a shoutout to Mr. Price. Thank you for the pleasant meal, and conversation. Your staff, the food, and drinks were awesome.

Maybe there’s a little bit of my Uncle Joe in me after all, with that ability to make friends wherever I go.

After the show, we were winding down, but we made it a point to stop at the Winking Lizard, the hotel right by the hotel, before we turned in for the night. All I will say is, I never realized that downtown Cleveland really dies down around 1 a.m. and I didn't manage to get my souvenir. 

Before we could head home the next morning, we had one more stop to make. 

Franklin Castle is an American Queen Anne style, with four stories. Okay, so legend has it that this is the most haunted house in Ohio, but we didn’t get to test that theory because these days the house is private property.

The house was built in 1881 by architects Cudell & Richardson, for an immigrant family. Rumor says that there were several tragedies and deaths in the house, and that there are hidden rooms and passageways that were used during Prohibition.

The gate is padlocked, so there wasn’t an opportunity to knock on the door and ask if we could see inside. I'm curious if the ballroom still exists, although any information I have managed to find, says that in 2012, the new owner was planning to turn the historic building into a three family dwelling.

Don’t think for one second I didn’t think about climbing the fence. In the end, it wouldn’t have been worth the criminal charge. But it is worth the drive by viewing.

So, even though I didn’t get to see the inside, I was still able to walk around the fence and take pictures of the outside of the castle, knocking yet another castle off my list of eight in the state of Ohio.

We came home, exhausted, but relaxed.

I know that I normally end these things with some big epiphany, and life lesson I have had through the course of my adventure. This time I’m drawing a blank. We had a good weekend. Maybe the life lesson for this week is sometimes it’s okay to just relax, and enjoy the scenery.

Next month is my birthday. That means I need to plan my next adventure and am always willing drag along a new partner in crime. 

Melt Bar & Grilled

B.A. Sweetie Candy Company

Hidden treasure in Playhouse Square, newly opened. Check it out. 

This was a $9.50 appetizer! It fed two of us!

Franklin Castle

I clean up nice. 

My Weekend partner in crime. 

Even through heartbreak, there's always a reason to smile.

Well October ended with a bang, or more appropriately a lot of jumping around at a Drowning Pool concert with my best friend. (more about that in a minute)

October is always a hard month for me. I was always a girl that loved Halloween, but 17 years ago, my best friend died on Halloween, two weeks after her 18th birthday. It's made the remaining years tough. So, on Halloween, I always try to find something to celebrate. I make a month out of enjoying the scares, and dressing up.

This year's costume is by far my favorite and one I will probably wear a few more times. As a little girl She-ra was my hero. I faithfully watched her and her horse Spirit take on the bad guys. My soul dies a little bit whenever someone asks me who She-ra is.

When my niece (yes, she's my cousin but I say niece because that's the relationship we have) Danny said I had to dress up to take Lyndsey trick or treating, I was a little unsure of myself. The outfit is a little, revealing and I didn't want the other parents staring at me, judging me.

Half way through it, I looked at these girls who I would defend with my life, realized I never want them to be ashamed to be themselves and  said, "Ya know what, at least I have the courage to be a little crazy sometimes." Body shaming, be damned!

I think that defines me some days.

Speaking of the courage to be a little crazy, I've still been hanging out with the brother's friends (I should stop saying my brother's friends, they've become my friends too). They make me laugh hysterically, and teach me to not take myself so seriously. Sometimes though, we get into these deep conversations like "Do you believe in soul mates," or "Do you think it's entirely possible that we're too selfish to love someone 100 percent?"

I don't get deep with many people, but I dig it.

Currently, we're having a debate about whether a dinner I went on last week was a date, or just friends hanging out. Yeah, I'm that dense when it comes to the male intentions. My assumption is that it was friends hanging out, they say no guy is taking a girl to dinner unless it's a date.

I won't mention his name, until I get it figured out, but we went to a dive joint, had burgers and laughed. I think we've talked every day this week, and when he had to cancel a dinner this week, he instead filled my jacket with candy as I took pics of trick or treaters for work. 

I couldn't talk him into going to  Scarey Carey (local haunted house) with me to take pics,  that might be a good thing as the freaky clown had all sorts of fun with me and he assures me that he's a wuss that won't even watch scary movies.

At work we had a little Halloween party. I have missed the comradery of my Lowe's people, but maybe I'm finding a little of it at the paper. It's a process.

I also  covered a story, yesterday, about a boy, he's 19, he's terminal and his school held a special graduation ceremony for him. Afterwards I went up to talk to him, we played arm wrestling and when I went to walk away, he kissed my hand and melted my heart.

I wrote his story through tears, but what I took from him was that no matter what life hands you, there is always a reason to be happy. Sometimes simple things are what's important in life. Also, a little kindness is the most memorable thing in the world.

Remember that 92-year-old veteran that told me "dare, dream, do"? This week, I found out he is also the master of cornhole. So basically, I touched the first cornhole boards. Someone asked me how  I felt, and I said, "Like I am the chosen one baby!"

I guess that ties into this, because as I wrote his story, I sat and listened to the recording of our interview. When I asked how he met his wife he said "I saw her playing in sixth grade and said, 'that's gonna be my girl' and she has been for 71 years." What do you think it takes to love someone like that?

On a serious note, the publisher stopped by to chat this week and asked me what I feel I need to improve on. I think I've improved somewhat, but AP style still freaks me out and throws me for a loop. Whenever I think I have it figured out, I don't. He says I've got the instinct, but AP style is my new nemesis.

I feel like I can write stories that will make you laugh or cry, but when it comes to obits and blotter, I feel like I'm constantly screwing up. Story of my life, the complicated things I seem to be able to handle, and the simple things I struggle with. 

On the kid front, there was an Army recruiter at my house this week. Two of my boys are taking the ASFAB next week. Mom's a little nervous, but they need to leave the nest and pay for college. Especially since now, they're all pushing for me to get a love life. When did my 21-year-old start trying to hand me life advice?

So about that Drowning Pool concert, I had fun and of course worried about Vicki when the strobe lights started. It's that damn nurture thing.

One of the things I told my brother's (and mine, you guys are mine too) friends this week is that, if you put me in a bar, the creepiest guys in the bar will hit on me. Five creeps and one couple (really really was NOT amused at that). Vicki, I love you but laughing at me through that is no help! So guys, here is some advice, don't hit on a girl during a concert. It's loud, I can't hear you anyway, and I paid money to watch the band. Also, if you ask me during a concert what my name is, the answer will be Tiffany.

Next week is election week, so I get to cover my first election stories and then who knows what my week will bring? No matter what my week brings, I'll try to remember, no matter what the heartbreak there is always a reason to smile.

Stay tuned for the next rendition of my crazy life, when maybe I'll figure out if it was a date or dinner, and to see if I ever manage to conquer AP!

To The Top

It was a bittersweet week, going to Cincinnati knowing this would be my last week at Cincinnati Magazine. I didn't plan for any big adventures, because I finally realized something. Cincinnati was the adventure. I've spent the last two months exploring new places and new things. I've experienced the city.

Even though I never got to go a museum because of the hours, I still visited numerous parks, and restaurants that are Cincinnati favorites. The staff at the magazine was amazing. They were patient when I had questions, and I got the opportunity to learn about how magazines are created. I also got to see my name in print. I know that the smell of ink is one that will forever bring me joy.

On my last day, I had quite the tearjerker moment when I walked in and found a card laying on my seat. Shelly and Kristen and I finally went to the top of Carew Towers. After 45 floors, you have to take a much smaller elevator that is created only for four people. We went to the observation deck, paid our two dollars and walked out. Afterwards, we walked down to Skyline and I allowed myself one last small three-way, before I start back to eating healthy and working out all the time.

From the top of the tower, we could look down and see Fountain Square, the river, and even Union Terminal. A lesson that I learned, if you want to see the city, really see the city, start from the tallest structure.

Afterwards, we hugged and said our good-byes and exchanged information so we can keep in touch. The publishing world isn't very big and I'm sure we'll be seeing each other again.

So, I hope you've enjoyed my adventures. I will take the rest of summer to spend with my kids, and family and friends that I have neglected during this time. Don't think my adventures are over. There's already talk about a day at Toledo Botanical Gardens, and plans to maybe go to the Chicago Jazzfest. The world is huge, and there are so many things to see, and experience.

I'm ready for that next adventure.